For a long time I’ve felt like I’m made up by two different personalities. (I’ve always been convinced it’s because I’m a Gemini, though Kris would scoff.) One side of me is serious, focused, organised, and the other has her head in the clouds. The former is responsible, the latter is not irresponsible, but she is frivolous. A home bird who struggles alongside a free spirit. These days, the older I am, that bird beats its wings hard to fuel the fire that is life, and the spirit lays low. But it’s always there, beneath the surface.
This used to leave me feeling very conflicted – wanting to be home and secure juxtaposed with the wanderlust of a young romantic, a dreamer. As time has gone on, the two now complement each other. I have a family of my own to take care of but I satisfy the bohemian within through writing and travel. Now, the conflict is more evident in my wardrobe.
My sense of personal style has, like many, matured over the years. I tend to wear structured clothes in quality fabrics to highlight and flatter what is now a slightly soft-around-the-edges hourglass shape. That said, I have this real attraction for the fancy and the frothy, the whimsy and the natural which are often associated with and attributed to youth.
So, as I have done in life, I try to find a balance with what I wear. I have more tailored pieces that work well for work or drinks, while my weekends are made up of jeans and cute tops or dresses. For now, life is a blend of work and home, a weird fusion of round-the-clock responsibility – and yet all I’m wearing are jeans, pretty tops and summer dresses.
I’m wearing: top, Monsoon (old, similar here); jeans, Zara (current); sunglasses, Nicole Farhi (old, similar here).
I think you have summed up beautifully what a lot of us feel. Getting on in years brings a maturity and sometimes wisdom, but there is always a younger self tempting you to be that twenty something again, before any real responsibilities kicked in. You never thought twice about spending the rest of your salary a week before pay day to go on that trip or buy that new dress. Nowadays you think twice.
You were a Gemini from when you were born and throughout your life. You will forever be a Gemini!
Good description of yourself too.